My Old Man and I just mailed off our wedding present to his sister and her new husband, who were married last October 30th, and whose wedding we attended. I had meant to get the gift in the mail earlier, but I felt pretty good about sending when we did. After all, we have a year after the wedding - according to Emily Post - and we got it there within four months.
But how do I know that Emily Post says that you have a year after a wedding to send the couple their gift? Um, someone told me. Like eight years ago. And though I don't remember who it was that told me, I absorbed that information and made it part of my personal philosophy. Our of curiosity, I checked the Emily Post website, and I found out that Emily Post's spokesperson (some random person named Peggy Post) claims that this is not true! "Contrary to a current rumor that you have a year to send a gift, it really should be sent right away or within three months of the wedding." Three months! Come on! How about four?
Well, I guess I don't really give a rat's ass what Emily Post (or her great-great grand niece) says, especially if what they say does not correspond with habits that I happen to cherish. (Bring a present to the wedding? Or send it in advance? I don't know if I can get it together to do that and procure a new pair of pantyhose for the event, plus arrange a clean shirt for my son. I'm only human!) At the same time, though, I don't want to offend my loved ones, especially during such a festive time of their lives. So what do you think? Orange recently asked her readers what our personal cash limits for wedding gift spending are. What are your personal time limits for wedding gift sending? Have you bought into the you-have-a-year "rumor"? And if so, what can we do to get turn this rumor into law? I personally was under the spell of this belief back when my Old Man and I got married, and I must say it was kind of nice having gifts trickle in months after the blessed day. Especially since I felt no need to get pissy about those gifts being late.
I also recently heard (from a friend who is both Southern and gay, two things that somehow give him more etiquette cred in my book) that it's untrue that the most mannerly thing to do when served with a plate of hot food is wait 'til everyone at the table is served. He says if the food is cold, wait. But if it's hot it makes everyone else uncomfortable to watch your food cool as you wait for them to be served, so you should begin right away. I believe he even invoked the name of Post at some point during this conversation. And of course I bought it wholesale. It makes sense! And it gives me permission to do what I already really, really want to do. I don't even want to look into whether it's technically correct.
But what do you think? About the wedding present window, and about hot food?