It's That Time Again
Laying in bed nursing Roo a few minutes ago, I noticed how strange it felt to be awake and not running around crazily doing something, either with or without a baby on my hip. These days, it seems like nursing is the only time I actually get to sit down without feverishly typing, grading, or prepping for class, or to lay down without thinking "OK, I've got 6 hours and 40 minutes in this bed, and I'm going to get woken up at least once in that time by a hungry baby. Time to sleep! One, two, three, sleep damnit!"
It's not uncommon for me to feel stressed and hectic at the end of the school year, but there's something special about adding the demands of mothering a baby to the mix. Of course, at this time last year I was unloading about how busy I was, and I was indeed busy. But even though I've divested myself of a number of responsibilities I had this time last year, I'm still feeling a bit berserk.
And yet, I'm giddily happy. Sometimes I feel like a love-crazed nineteen-year-old who, despite lacking sleep and burning her candle at both ends (the love end and the work end), is chipper and energetic due to all the endorphins and other miscellaneous love chemicals coursing through her system. I was that love-crazed nineteen-year-old once upon a time, and this feels very familiar. But instead of simply being in love with a boy (and with the new fact that orgasm could be a shared rather than a solitary experience), I'm rather complicatedly in love with my man, my little boy, and my baby girl all at once (and feeling happy despite the fact that orgasms, be they shared or solitary, are proving somewhat hard to fit in with all this parenting, working, and logistical whatnot going on).
In any case, I am so, SO looking forward to summer break. Which begins in approximately a week and a half. Have I ever mentioned that among the many things I love about teaching, I dearly love summer break?
Hopefully summer break will bring more extra-lactational relaxation. And more regular blog posts.
And more orgasms.
It's not uncommon for me to feel stressed and hectic at the end of the school year, but there's something special about adding the demands of mothering a baby to the mix. Of course, at this time last year I was unloading about how busy I was, and I was indeed busy. But even though I've divested myself of a number of responsibilities I had this time last year, I'm still feeling a bit berserk.
And yet, I'm giddily happy. Sometimes I feel like a love-crazed nineteen-year-old who, despite lacking sleep and burning her candle at both ends (the love end and the work end), is chipper and energetic due to all the endorphins and other miscellaneous love chemicals coursing through her system. I was that love-crazed nineteen-year-old once upon a time, and this feels very familiar. But instead of simply being in love with a boy (and with the new fact that orgasm could be a shared rather than a solitary experience), I'm rather complicatedly in love with my man, my little boy, and my baby girl all at once (and feeling happy despite the fact that orgasms, be they shared or solitary, are proving somewhat hard to fit in with all this parenting, working, and logistical whatnot going on).
In any case, I am so, SO looking forward to summer break. Which begins in approximately a week and a half. Have I ever mentioned that among the many things I love about teaching, I dearly love summer break?
Hopefully summer break will bring more extra-lactational relaxation. And more regular blog posts.
And more orgasms.
2 Comments:
Here's to regular posting and regular lovin'! Glad that the summer is almost upon you. That old joke about the three best reasons to teach being "June, July, and August" is so not even funny, come late May. Whoo, summer! Whoo, lactating tits in tank tops!
Summer break ... I want one too.
But I hear you on the too busy thing.
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